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In this episode of The Good News with Angie Austin, Angie and her guest, Grace Fox, chat about the unique bonds formed through radio broadcasting and friendships that span years. They dive into the complex emotions tied to children growing up and leaving home, sharing personal stories and insights around the concept of empty nesting. Amidst the discussion, they highlight the importance of maintaining diverse relationships that enrich our perspectives and lives. The conversation shifts to one of Grace's books, Fresh Hope for Today, which offers a spiritual outlook on life's evolving paths. By drawing from her travels and experiences overseas, Grace presents a thought-provoking view that aligns our day-to-day struggles with a broader understanding of God's plans. Angie and Grace explore how everyone can find solace in faith, even when the path isn't clear. Later, Angie brings in Jim Stovall to discuss his 'Winner's Wisdom' column. They explore practical approaches to productivity and the significance of implementing a purposeful life strategy. Whether through maintaining lists or developing a proactive mindset, this episode provides listeners with lasting wisdom and encouragement to embrace life's unpredictability.
SPEAKER 01 :
Welcome to The Good News with Angie Austin. Now with The Good News, here's Angie.
SPEAKER 05 :
hey friend it's the good news with angie austin and grace fox always look forward to our visits i feel like she's an old friend but really we've just been doing radio for two years but i feel like we've known each other a long time welcome grace fox thank you for having me angie maybe one of these days we'll be able to actually meet in person would that be fun yes i actually want to do that because it's funny you mentioned that i have this friend dr cheryl lentz we've done interviews for probably about 10 years And we've tried a couple of times to meet, but we've kind of made it like a goal of ours. And my co-host of many years, Michael Pelka, he and I finally met at Denver International Airport on a layover of all things. And we sat and had a sandwich and laughed and took pictures because we'd had so many guests over the years and we wanted to show them that we'd finally met.
SPEAKER 06 :
Yeah, it's funny how we could do stuff like this for a long time. There's a lady who contacted me probably... I want to say eight or ten years ago after her son got married. And she was really going through a hard time thinking, I don't know what my role is as a mom anymore because he's not around. What do I do? I had written an article years before about being ready when your son gets married and how to navigate that as a mother-in-law. She found that online and contacted me. And we have been friends ever since. So we've never met in person, but we've got this great relationship back and forth.
SPEAKER 05 :
oh i love that you know um speaking about kids leaving my son's not getting married but he just moved out to go to college because he'd done the fur he commuted and he did some online classes the first semester so anyway i moved him up to my school university of colorado boulder where my grandmother went to school to be a teacher my father went to school there he went to law school there he got his phd somewhere else he was very into education Even though, oddly enough, we were estranged for like 35 years because he had a major alcohol issue and was a violent drinker. One thing I definitely got from him, though, was my love or I should say appreciation of education. So he was actually... We... I guess he met my kids when my son was maybe eight because my son asked if I had a dad because I didn't have anything to say that was good. So why say anything, right? So anyway, he ended up being a really spectacular grandfather. He didn't drink anymore. He was very intelligent, very articulate. He was a speaker. He announced all the basketball games. He worked in education. his entire, you know, adult life pretty much. So anyway, my son now is following in grandpa's footsteps too, because he went to the same school and myself and now my son. So I think that's kind of cool. So anyway, my husband said to me this morning, he said, it's sad. I go, oh, that the puppy is leaving in a week because we've been raising this puppy for a friend. And I said, oh, that the puppy's leaving in a week. He goes, no, Riley. Like he left and then the next one's going to leave and then the next one's going to leave and then they'll be all gone. It'll just be us and the pets. I thought, cause I'm not sad yet. Cause I, you know, I'm going up there tomorrow to bring him some things. It's only, you know, an hour away. But I'm sure as time goes on and more of them start to leave, it's a, I see what people say about the empty nest syndrome or whatever. They get a little depressed because their lives have many, many cases revolved around their children, you know?
SPEAKER 06 :
My husband laughs about that. He said, you have to be careful who we say this to. But when our final one left, it took him about 10 minutes to get over being sad. And he said, it's not that he was glad the kids are finally gone. It's just that, you know, he misses them. We still miss them all to this day. And they left a long time ago, all three of them. But it just is a different season of life. And so he was ready for that.
SPEAKER 05 :
Yeah, I'm looking forward to some of the traveling and other things, and even with them, you know, in their time off, because we're still going to have many years while they're in school, and they'll have breaks to do things with, you know, with me. And I already bought a pass to go to Nashville a lot to see my daughter, who's going to school at Christian University there next year. So I have one of those, you know, flight passes where I can go see her a lot. Speaking of travel, I wanted to mention something to you. We're going to talk about... Today, Fresh Hope for Today, one of Grace's books, and we're talking about a heavenly perspective, but because we've talked about her time in Nepal and my neighbors from Nepal, and then I went to my son's, he's actually in kind of a Christian dorm. It's run by a Christian ministry. It's right across the street from the university, which is like 40,000 kids. and this ministry caters to a lot of um international students so there's kids you know like i think his roommate's going to be from denmark whether from china jamaica india japan etc so they're from all over the world and uh when riley uh went to get shown around we met this really great young man from india and uh his name's uh partha and so he's showing us around and it came up with he was a christian and we're christians and he leads the bible study and He and my son go to the same like, you know, center, Bella Center, where Young Life meets and then his Christian group meets Partha's. So anyway, in talking to him, I said, yeah, it's going to be hard, difficult because, you know, I talk to my son every day. We're really close and we like to chit chat. I mean, he already FaceTimed me this morning for like 45 minutes and he's like, oh, you have to go. I'm going to be lonely. And I'm like, you're fine. Go take your nap. You know, I've got to work. And so anyway. And Partha said, I don't have the privilege of talking to my parents. And at first I didn't think I understood him. I said, what did you say? He goes, well, I don't have the privilege of talking to my parents. He said, both of my parents have died and I don't really have any family. And so because I was asking if he went back to India. And so I thought, oh, okay, well, he's definitely going to be the extra kid in the family. So I already told him to come. He's like getting his PhD in like mechanical engineering or something, you know, like super brainy. And so I already made him cookies and sent him up to thank him and told him we'll have to have him come over for dinner. So I think it's going to be a really great setting for my son to meet other Christians, but really people from completely different walks of life, you know.
SPEAKER 06 :
Well, there's so much to learn when you can do that, when you have the opportunity to get to know people who are from a different background. And they don't always think the same way that we do, but that's how we learn and grow is to get to know other people. Where they come from, their cultures. It's a great experience.
SPEAKER 05 :
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm excited to see, you know, who he'll become friends with there. It's a really neat, you know, set up the way they've arranged it there with so many international students. All right. So let's talk about Fresh Hope for today. And the devotion is a heavenly perspective. What's this about?
SPEAKER 06 :
Well, this is something that I came up with after traveling so many times overseas. There's a route that our planes often follow when we go to Europe and that is up and over the North Pole, that area up and over Greenland and then down to Eastern Europe. And so when we come back, it's always the daytime. And I love going to the back of the plane and just looking out the porthole window back where the flight attendants are in that area of the plane. You can look down. and see what's going on down below. Because most of the times when we come back, it's clear. I don't know why. We're just lucked out, I guess, with weather. But it's just clear. And we're flying at, say, 35,000 feet maybe. But we can see. all the way down like we can see the mountains we can see the snow on the mountains we can see the water down below but the ice we can see the cracks in the ice that's how clear the view is and i've often thought as we're flying there that uh yeah that's a bird's eye view right i've flown over the netherlands in the springtime when the tulips are in bloom and we've seen the fields of red tulips and yellow tulips it's just absolutely gorgeous i've flown over the hillsides in Nepal. And you see the thatched roof hut sitting on the terrace hillside.
SPEAKER 05 :
Oh, wow.
SPEAKER 06 :
I've seen, it's just stunning. I've seen so much from the air. But then I think that's so different from the view I get sitting on the plane, sitting on the tarmac at an airport and just looking around at the buildings and the concrete. And I think, you know, it's kind of like life because When we are walking with the Lord, he will do things in our lives that we don't understand. And it's like trusting him that he's got the bird's eye view. He's the one that is there who can see long distance and he knows what he's up to. As humans, we're the ones that's like sitting on the tarmac and we've got this very limited perspective of what's happening around us. And so when we go through hard times, to be able to remember that he's the one who sits in the heavenlies with that bird's eye view. And he knows where he's taking us. He knows what that journey looks like. And we don't. But it's a matter of having to trust during those times, knowing that he's got a plan.
SPEAKER 05 :
And you talk in the devotion about someday we'll understand why God allowed or orchestrated certain events in our lives. And until then, we must trust that he knows best. And I love your little ponder section. You say, ponder, how might God's view of your circumstances differ from yours? I think it's difficult for many of us to really see things that way when we're caught in our own grief or selfish view of the world that's much smaller.
SPEAKER 06 :
Oh, I think so. I think that's really hard, especially when we're caught in grief. I found out this morning that one of my friends lost a very close friend last night. The guy was 45 years old. He got sick on Thursday, died last night. And yesterday I got word that one of my friend's son-in-laws passed away suddenly. So he was getting over bronchitis. He's 46 years old. just getting over bronchitis but he came in with his family after church yesterday morning and had a cardiac arrest and he's gone in his 40s left five kids yeah 40 he's 46 so left five kids the oldest one just in his first year of university and so in 24 hours one man 45 the other one 46 gone just like that it was in my circle and and i just uh you know i'm kind of reeling from that and i'm thinking god why would you allow that i'm sitting on the tarmac right now looking around going, boy, I don't get this. And God's the one who sees the big picture and he knows what's going on and he gets it. But at this time, there's so many people grieving for these two men who don't get it. And that's where we have to trust and know that he's up to something. We don't get it. But someday, maybe, maybe. But when we're in that position to be able to just say and admit that I don't understand what you're doing, But, well, help me see this through your eyes. And that is a really good prayer to pray. Help me see this through your eyes. And then watch as he unfolds that.
SPEAKER 05 :
I really like the book that you quoted, too, in this particular devotion, Experiencing God, Knowing and Doing the Will of God by Henry and Richard Blackaby and Claude King. and the quote is quote there will be times when you do not comprehend why god allows certain things to occur and that is to be expected he is the infinite god while we are limited human creatures he sees the eternal ramifications of everything that happens we don't and so we are supposed to you mentioned you know pray about you know, God seeing the details that we can't see, and we're more limited in our view, like the tarmac view of the concrete and the, you know, little carts driving around and all the luggage. So our vision is limited, and that we want to have the strength to trust, you know, God's perspective.
SPEAKER 06 :
Absolutely. I just really appreciate that quote as well, because we all have times when we don't comprehend why God is allowing certain things. But But that is to be expected because we do have very finite minds and finite perspectives. But to just keep going back to that, that God sees something I don't. And so, God, help me see this through your eyes.
SPEAKER 05 :
Well, I know you've got more coming out as well. And again, if you want that particular book, GraceFox.com, GraceFox.com, Fresh Hope for Today. And then what's next? You've got The Names of God, another book coming out in your series? Yes.
SPEAKER 06 :
Right. It's a three-book series. So Names of God, Living Unafraid. It's a small group resource studying seven names of God. That came out last July. This July, it will be Names of God, Knowing Peace. So I'm working on the videos now that will accompany the book. There's a video for every chapter. And then as soon as I've done that project, I'll turn my focus to Names of God, Growing Strong.
SPEAKER 05 :
Boy, it's a good thing those kids have moved out because you keep yourself so busy. I always appreciate you, friend. GraceFox.com. Thank you. God bless.
SPEAKER 06 :
Take care.
SPEAKER 04 :
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SPEAKER 02 :
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SPEAKER 05 :
Hey there, friend. Angie Austin and Jim Stovall with The Good News. We're talking about his Winner's Wisdom column. And this week it's Think and Do It Now. And it's one of his favorite topics and mine as well because I've really enjoyed over the years, maybe a decade or so that Jim and I have been radio friends. I really enjoyed getting to know about his parents. And he lost his mother not that long ago and then his father in the last year. And this is kind of a look back on, in particular, your father's life. Is that right, Jim?
SPEAKER 03 :
Yeah, it's been a difficult adjustment, but I'm so grateful, you know, as someone that writes books and movies and columns and talks to people like you on the radio about things in life I think that mattered. You know, I realize if everybody had been raised by my parents, I'd have to go get honest work. I don't know what I would do because, you know, so much of what I talk about, write about, make movies about is a reflection of them and Today, you know, my father ran an organization, a nonprofit, with about 400 employees. And so he was a great executive, a great manager. And he was a huge list taker. I mean, he said, you don't go to the grocery store without a list, so you don't waste your time. You know, don't do your life that way. You know, you have to have a list of things you're going to do and make sure you get everything done every day. And, you know, he was really big on that. And He had these little notebooks he would give out to all these people. You could fit it in your shirt pocket. And on half of them, it said, think. And then he had another one that said, do it now. And I just thought they were two different sayings on there. And years later, I found out, you know, he told me, no, Jim, it's not random. There are some people I give the ones that say, think. And there's other ones, people I give the ones that say, do it now. You know, there are people that... They have a knee-jerk reaction, and they need to stop and think before they act. I want them to think about what you're getting ready to do before you act, because if you don't have time to do it right, when are you going to have time to do it over? And then there's other people. They just get the analysis paralysis in there. They sit around forever and never do anything, and those people get the little notebook that says, do it now. Oh, that's funny. I mean, just make a move. Do something. That would be mine.
SPEAKER 05 :
I would need the do it now because I've been meaning to clean my closet now for weeks. I need the do it now.
SPEAKER 03 :
Yeah, and at some point, you put it on your book, and you just, okay, I'm going to do it. That makes it serious. There's something about writing it down, and I have a list every day of things I'm going to do. And I'm sitting here right now with it on my desk. I can't read it. Beth wrote it for me, but I still, there's something about in our society, having it in writing makes it real. You know, if you go somewhere and they say, well, they promised me this. Well, did they put it in writing? If you got it in writing, it's real. It's really going to happen. Well, if you write down for yourself, this is what I'm going to do today. It gets more real. It gets harder to do or not do. And, uh, It's okay to do or not do things, but when we have a plan we ought to implement. And, you know, that's what Dad was talking about was just, you know, if you're going to live your life, live it on purpose. I mean, you know, you don't go to the grocery store. Why would you live your life, you know, missing stuff or forgetting stuff? just because you didn't write it down. And how often do we, oh, I meant to do that, or I knew I wanted to call her for her birthday, or I should have sent him a card, or I forgot that event I really wanted to go to. And you miss so much of life, not because it wasn't possible for you to go, but you just didn't get it down. And that's the things that really frustrate me.
SPEAKER 05 :
Yeah, yeah, I am. I think that having the list and, you know, I've got one and it's got like pretty important things on it and I might not even get to any of them in the week, but I know like it's there and that, you know, I've got to get that physical therapy arranged for my kid or whatever. braces or you know x-rays for something or whatever but it's a pretty long list and there's a lot of stuff on it but i gradually kind of pick away at it maybe not as quickly as others but since i've got it that the list i mean nothing ever gets completely neglected yeah and it you know there's just so much learning to get it done and uh
SPEAKER 03 :
you know, and then as you know, I have a pending list. I mean, there's stuff I know I want to do, but it's not fitting in right now. So I put it over on my pending list and the 15th of each month, I look at that and it, well, is it time to do that now? Or do I look at it again next month? Is it time to do that yet? And there are things that all of a sudden now it's time to do that. And, uh, And then I have a project list of books and movies I want to make and projects I want to do. And I believe great ideas or inspiration is a divine gift. It comes to us. And if you don't write it down, you're going to waste it. And then you're going to wake up one day and say, oh, yeah, I always wanted to do that. Or what's really bad is when you have a great idea to do something and you forget about it until somebody else does it. Wow, I had that idea six years ago. Well, the difference is they did and you didn't. And that's, you know, you just don't want to be in one of those situations.
SPEAKER 05 :
Yeah, no, you do not. Now, when you say the 15th, I mean, I know you have a whole team around you. Do you have someone specific that really helps you with your organization? Do you have, you know, people that, you know, when you say the 15th, is that just you, you remember, or do you kind of have an organizer in your life, personally?
SPEAKER 03 :
No, it's on the calendar. Okay. On the 15th of the month, it's on my daily list of things to do. Go over the pending in the project list. And since I am blind, I can't read or write these things, I have a list here, and I have one at home. And so Beth helps me here in the office, and Crystal, my bride, helps me at home. And I don't separate personal from professional. I mean, people here in my office, they know when it's my brother's birthday or it's time for me to go to this appointment. It's all together there. Yes.
SPEAKER 05 :
That makes sense. Yeah. And then, okay, so Crystal was the one, your wife, that helped you all through college. She was kind of your right-hand man, woman, per se, that you graduated one and two in the class. Of course, her above you, because if she's helping you, she wants to make sure she gets that upper, that one leg up on you. And so you two were, you know, first and second in the class. Yeah. She's continued over the years to be like the person who assists you kind of is your teammate through life when it comes to organizing, keeping track of things and, you know, keeping your life orderly at home as well.
SPEAKER 03 :
Yeah, absolutely. And, you know, when she goes out of town or on her trip, she has her projects. She does. And she'll get everything organized before she leaves so that I can survive. And, yeah, I mean, it just, you know, we do things together and we have a little chat. different distribution of labor just because of my situation. And, but there's a lot of things I cover for her and she'll cover for me. And, you know, it's just, it's just great to get everything done and, and feel like, you know, okay, I'm ready for tomorrow. There are so many people, they've got all these random things in their life that, and they never feel like they can relax. They always ought to be doing something. And, you know, it's just bad, you know, it's nice to get everything marked off my list, get tomorrow's list and, and go home and realize, okay, I get to play until tomorrow.
SPEAKER 05 :
Now, you're so busy. Is your relaxation reading that one book a day that you do?
SPEAKER 03 :
Yeah, part of that is I read my book every day, and yeah, it's relaxing, but it's also my business. I mean, I've written over 50 books, so reading books is kind of my business, and it's what I do. So it's a little business, and it's a little pleasure all at the same time.
SPEAKER 05 :
Hmm. Just as a side note, my mom's been reading these Rick Bragg books, and one of them, somebody's man, somebody, whatever his mom's name was. So let's say it's Susie's man. But this particular book I read maybe 15 years ago, and I thought, oh my gosh, that really reminds me of my mom's life. So she just called me the other day and said... you've got to read one of these Rick Bragg books. They're so good, and it just really makes you think, and it kind of reminds me of my own life. And I've always thought to myself that as I've interviewed my mom here and there over the years, thinking maybe I'd write a book that he'd be the great person to do it with. I just really enjoy his writing style, and I don't read like you do. In fact, I'm embarrassed to tell you, and I'm sure I have before, that on my Audible, I start a book at night, and right now I'm listening to one on the... Aster family from, you know, like, I think it starts in the 1700s. And it's about the original, you know, Aster, a man who grew to fame and prominence through his, he was a, I didn't know this, he hunted beavers. He was a beaver trapper, a beaver trapper, I should say, they hunt them per se. Anyway, that's how he made his really millions and then Manhattan real estate. But I keep coming back to chapter three, because I'm falling asleep during the There's an opera house riot, and so I keep falling asleep. I don't know how I'm falling asleep in the riot, but so I keep going back to that. I've been listening to it now for several weeks, and it's really interesting. It's written by that CNN anchor who is related to the Vanderbilt family. Yes. It's such, I mean, I love it. You've probably already read it knowing you, but it's Anderson Cooper. And so anyway, it's a great book, but I don't go through them once a day like you do. It probably takes me at least a month, if not six weeks, because it's kind of my way to fall asleep. But I also find it a fascinating way to fall asleep because I feel like I'm learning about history as I fall asleep.
SPEAKER 03 :
Yeah, and it's fine. And, I mean, you might try speeding it up just a little bit if you can. And, you know, I find if my mind's wandering too much, it's because it's not going fast enough. Oh, that's a good idea. If you're not going fast enough, you don't have space to wander. You have to really focus on what you're doing. And Audible will let you do that. And since you mentioned the Audible, I – follow the New York Times bestseller list every week, and I check out their book review, and there's a book coming out in March I got an advanced copy on, and it's simply entitled James. And this guy went out and rewrote Huckleberry Finn from the perspective of the slave Jim. And it's called James, and it will be out in March. And it is magnificent. The only thing wrong with this book is I didn't think of it. That's what's wrong with that.
SPEAKER 05 :
Wow. Okay, I'll get that one because I have four. It's expensive, Audible, but I have a hard time giving up my credits, but I have a lot of credits right now. So, okay, I'll get that one. mention one more thing since we're talking about your parents and you know your marriage and that great example your parents had you know of a great marriage living into their 90s your grandmother was also the grandmother that wanted to give you her eyes when she found out you were going blind she thought she could somehow you know like medically give you her eyes after she watched her spring flowers bloom then you were gonna get them and you had to explain that no grandma you can't give me your eyes whose whose mom was that that was my father's mother
SPEAKER 03 :
Her name was Eileen Stovall, and she lived in Springfield, Missouri, a little town there, and lived to a ripe old age. And she's the one that also gave me the Golden List. That's right. She was an amazing lady.
SPEAKER 05 :
the golden list of all the things you're grateful for, that she'd hear your complaints after you wrote your golden list and then you didn't have complaints anymore. Now, so you not only had great parents, but from my understanding, you had really wonderful grandparents as well, in general.
SPEAKER 03 :
Yes, I'm very, very fortunate. And thankfully, three of the four of them lived long enough to where I got to know them really well. So it's really great. I remember my grandfather, my father's father, telling me, you know, When I was nine years old, I'm sitting in his living room, and he said, it's been an amazing life. He said, I was born in 1900, and I came to Missouri in a covered wagon, and now we're sitting in my air-conditioned house watching my color TV while a man lands on the moon. And he said, this has been an amazing life. And he lived another 25 years past that. And it was just, but to think, you know, a guy that all he knew was that he came to a new place in a covered wagon, and then he sits there and watches somebody land on the moon. I don't know of any other generation or time in the human experience when people have done something like that.
SPEAKER 05 :
I just think it's cool. I love hearing about your family and because mine was quite different from yours. It's neat that we travel in the same circles. And I believe because of my faith, maybe I did turn out more like you because I did have a foundation that wasn't necessarily like earthly through my parents, but that I had a good role model per se in learning about, you know, faith and being kind to others and treating people as you'd like to be treated. So it's all good, Jim Stovall. Now we're in this, we travel in the same circles.
SPEAKER 03 :
Well, you know, as Gandhi said, everyone is my superior in that I can learn something from them. And, you know, there are people we learn I want to be like them. And then there are people that you learn, wow, I want to be something other than that. And you and I are on opposite ends of that. But we both learned from our families.
SPEAKER 05 :
Indeed. Jim Stovall dot com. Thank you, my friend. A real blessing to have you on every week.
SPEAKER 03 :
Be well.
SPEAKER 01 :
Thank you for listening to The Good News with Angie Austin on AM670 KLTT.
SPEAKER 01 :
welcome to the good news with angie austin now with the good news here's angie
SPEAKER 02 :
Hey there, Angie Austin and Jim Stovall with the good news. Hey, Jim.
SPEAKER 03 :
It is great to be with you as always.
SPEAKER 02 :
You as well. We're talking about your winner's wisdom column and this week it's the price of tuition. But I thought we'd start with, you know, Michael Pelka and I've done radio for like a decade, I think now and not quite maybe, but we did a show together for years and we'd never met in person and we just met in person today, as you know. So we had to send you a picture right away because Mike met you through me and we both talk to you every week now.
SPEAKER 03 :
Yeah, and, you know, it's amazing because in person I've never met either one of you, although as a blind guy myself, it's not a lot different, you know, but it's kind of out of sight, out of mind. But, yeah, I think it's so cool you guys got together. sent me the photo, and it's actual evidence that there is really a Michael Pelka.
SPEAKER 02 :
Yes.
SPEAKER 03 :
So that's good to know.
SPEAKER 02 :
Yeah, and you know, it's funny because he was exactly like I thought. I mean, he's exactly like I thought he'd be, and speaking with him, we did a four-hour show every weekday, and I've seen a lot of his posts on social media and he's always golfing and I knew exactly what he'd look like, but he thought he'd have a very short period of time. Cause he said that Denver airport's too big and that he had to like, he's like, I'm getting all my steps in. I'm taking trip now, planes, trains, and automobiles. He's like, I'm barely going to have time to talk to you. So he walked by the table and he said, nice to meet you. And then kept walking out. Like he had to leave that quickly. And I'm like, it's classic Mike.
SPEAKER 03 :
Yeah, that's Mike. And it is. And, uh, And he actually emailed me after the meeting with you and told me he got to meet you. But unfortunately, he was delayed. So his show is backing up from Tuesday to Wednesday this week. So, yeah, it's not as easy getting around as it needs to be. And that airport is – It would have been nice if they'd have built it in Denver.
SPEAKER 02 :
Yeah, it takes a long time to get out there. I mean, the first time I drove there, I was like, wow. It feels like it's almost in another state, but it's way out on the plains. It feels like you're driving into the eastern plains. But, you know, they've started bringing Denver out to the airport. They've continued to build out towards it. So they're actually starting to build neighborhoods not that far from the airport, even though it used to be in the middle of nowhere. Yeah.
SPEAKER 03 :
Yeah, and I will always be grateful for that. I owe one of my movies to that. I was staying at the Brown Palace there in Denver, and there was a movie producer there we'd met, and we just had not been able to come to terms on the deal. And he said, well, I've got to go to the airport. And I said, well, we have a car. We're going to fly out a little later. We'll take you. Well, because it's an hour, by the time we got through the city traffic and got out there, we were able to put together the whole movie deal, all the points, everything, and everything. If the traffic had been any worse, we could have written the script right there in the car. Oh, that's hilarious. So I will never complain about that airport.
SPEAKER 02 :
uh, you know, with, um, you know, driving out there for Mike, I was, I don't know how it worked out, but I was over two hours early. So I'm like, do I go home? And I'm like, no, it's too far because it's so far out there. But, um, he told me that he'd read your, um, the book that you made into your first movie, the ultimate gift. Cause he's trying to read 50 books this year. And I'm like, oh, Jim reads a book a day. And of course he knew that already. And, uh, I said, well, how, how was the ultimate gift? He goes, well, he made a movie out of it. I'm like, yes. I'm aware. And he says, it's great. It's great. They made a, it was his first like big movie. I'm like, yep, yep, yep. Remember I introduced you to Jim. So I know all this. So anyway, uh, he really enjoyed your book. He's trying to read, I think one of your books a month.
SPEAKER 03 :
Well, and that, that's great. I just, uh, Mike is the, the two of you together was, was just absolutely fascinating. The yin and yang of, uh, of human existence. It was quite an experience talking to both of you. And, uh, and it's, it's ironic because, uh, You know, I talk to you about my column and then I talk to him about my column. And it's a completely different conversation. It is absolutely different. And for me, it's like, you know, as a blind person, if I go somewhere, I experience much of it through them. And there are some people, you know, you want to take to the party, the fair, the parade, the circus. That's you. There are some people you want to take to the lecture, you know, the museum, whatever. That's Mike.
SPEAKER 02 :
He's so sharp.
SPEAKER 03 :
Yeah, he is. But for you, everything's a day at the beach. Everything's great. And Mike, if he finds the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, he's analyzing, why didn't we get two of these?
SPEAKER 02 :
Right, right. He's going to question the pot of gold and make sure it's legit.
SPEAKER 03 :
Yeah.
SPEAKER 02 :
Yeah. And find out whether or not it's a Republican. Oh, he had, you'll have to ask him too. When you get your private time with him, he has three ideas of who he believes Donald Trump will choose as his VP candidates. So ask him about that next time you talk to him. It's pretty interesting. All right. And we'll see if he's right. Right. All right. Well, I've got two kids that are looking at colleges right now. So let's talk about your column, the price of tuition.
SPEAKER 03 :
Well, you know, as you know, through the Stovall center for entrepreneurship at the university, uh, I interact with a lot of kids, and we have students from over 100 nations right now on campus, and it's really rather amazing. Tuition is unbelievably expensive, particularly from some of these people that come from third-world countries. I mean, going to college in America is quite a thing. But I always tell them, please remember, the price of tuition is the same whether you learn the lesson or you don't. And, you know, we all know about tuition and going to school and learning things in school. But in life, it's the same way. You know, life is always teaching us lessons. And failure is the tuition we pay for not learning. And you keep learning until you get it. So you keep failing until you get the lesson in it. The great philosopher Billy Joel once said, I am the entertainer. I had to pay my price. The things I did not learn at first, I learned by doing twice. And if you don't want to learn from Billy Joel, I get it. Churchill said that those who do not learn from history are destined to repeat it. You either learn from history or you get to do it over again. So I always tell people, you know, every time there's a problem, a challenge or whatever, that's a lesson learned. and you can learn it and not repeat it yourself, and you can help other people not repeat that. And then the converse is true. You can learn from other people's mistakes, and you don't have to burn your head on the stove if you just watch somebody else do it. You can say, you know, I believe I'll just bypass that lesson and check that one off and move on.
SPEAKER 02 :
I love that. And, you know, to see every failure, every trip, every stumble as a lesson, learning experiences, I think something that's becoming more trendy. It seems like for many years, many of us thought that failures were, you know, possibly a reason to quit. And now it just seems like part of the journey.
SPEAKER 03 :
Yeah, I mean, failure is fertilizer for the future. And every time something happens bad, you know, the whole world's praying for that great idea. Angie, the only thing you got to do to have a great idea is go through your daily routine, wait for something bad to happen. Ask yourself, how could I have avoided that? And the answer is a great idea. And the only thing you got to do to turn that great idea into a great business is ask, how can I help other people avoid that? And the world will give you fame and fortune and everything you ever wanted. If you'll just help them solve their problems. And as in most things, uh, It ain't about you, and it ain't about me. It's about them. And solve their problems, and they'll give you anything you want. And my late great mentor, Zig Ziglar, always said, you can have everything you want out of life if you'll help enough other people get what they want out of life.
SPEAKER 02 :
I like that. You use a lot of quotes. In fact, you've got a book, another book coming out about famous quotes and speeches. And you talk about Winston Churchill and talking about learning from history. Those who do not learn from history are destined to repeat it. And I feel like many of us do that. We just keep doing things the same old way. And expect a different outcome. And we just get stuck in a rut like our brains wired a certain way. And we just thought, well, we'll try it again this way. We'll try it again this way. And so you talk about in the article when you're raising your kids or teaching students or whatever, that you shouldn't allow a mistake to be made without a change. You shouldn't allow a mistake to be made without a corresponding change. So stop doing it the same way, right?
SPEAKER 03 :
Yeah. Yeah. And, you know, I don't quote him often, but Clinton said that never let a good crisis go to waste. And that's what he meant. I mean, hey, all this garbage, there's got to be a lesson in here somewhere. And because if we keep doing the same thing we've been doing, we're going to keep getting the same thing we always got. So when you or your kids or your students or anybody makes a mistake, the first thing, what did you learn? And what are you going to do different next time? Otherwise, we're going to be sitting right here at the scene of another accident having this same conversation.
SPEAKER 02 :
Now, when you talk about the Stovall Center for Entrepreneurship, I know you made a big donation and that was a, you know, a goal of yours from, you know, a young age that you wanted to make a big donation. Your name, you know, is a part of the, you know, building, et cetera. Now, what's your responsibility in terms of teaching these kids? Are you teaching them? Are you mentoring them? Like, how does that work? And is it just volunteer? Is it because your names, you know, associated with the program? How does that all work?
SPEAKER 03 :
Well, I'm very glad to say we have professors and teachers and wonderful people there who work with the university. I do have an office there, and I lecture some of the classes, and I teach and mentor the kids. But, I mean, you have to have academic standards to be an accredited university, so thankfully we have people that are really, really good at that, and I try to stay out of their way. But I am excited to get to work with these young people who – you know, it's amazing. They haven't yet figured out what's impossible. And so they end up doing some things I would not have even thought feasible. And I watched them do that. And they just didn't know you can't do that. And that's an amazing thing to observe. And, you know, the energy they have and the excitement. And they're growing up in a different world. You You know, I'm working with people that, you know, were born after 9-11. I mean, it's a completely different environment. And, you know, they never have known a world without cell phones and digital media and total connectivity around the world. And, you know, that's been a big part of their lives.
SPEAKER 02 :
Yeah, yeah. Well, and I love that, you know, you defer to the, you know, professors, but I'm sure that the kids also really want to pick your brain about, you know, what you've learned. And I know you have a big contest every year, too, with the students, not you per se, but just in general. Can you tell us about that?
SPEAKER 03 :
Yeah, it's called the Launch Competition. We do it every year. We just finished our fifth one. And, you know, think Shark Tank. But it lasts a whole year, and kids actually start real businesses. And then we bring in venture capitalists. We bring in investors and different people. And then we have a panel of expert judges that we bring in. And the kids put on a real business pitch for this new venture they've started. And it's not like playing Monopoly. These are real companies these kids have started. Truly amazing. And, you know, to see what they can do and, you know, really, really begin to change the world. And I always remind them, you know, education, particularly at this level, this is not something, you know, we're going to learn today and maybe someday in the by and by we're going to do some. Three of the five largest businesses on planet Earth started in somebody's dorm room. Three of the five. Wow.
SPEAKER 05 :
That is crazy.
SPEAKER 03 :
Let's don't wait around. I mean, you know, look at where, you know, Bill Gates came from and look at where Steve Jobs came from and look at what these people were doing. These aren't people that waited until, you know, all the lights were green before they left the house. These are people that left the cave, went out and killed something and brought it home. And it's time for you to go do something.
SPEAKER 02 :
I love it. One of our friend Mike was saying, why don't you get your kid to go on Shark Tank? Wouldn't that be cool? And I thought, wow, that would be cool since he has had his business since he was, you know, a kid. All right. Jim Stovall dot com. Jim Stovall dot com. We'll talk to you next week, friend. Thank you.
SPEAKER 03 :
I look forward to it. Thanks, Angie.
SPEAKER 02 :
Colorado Springs is listening to the Mighty 670 KLT.
SPEAKER 05 :
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SPEAKER 02 :
Hello there, friend. Angie Austin with the good news. Cal Phaibus is joining us. He is an author, but he has quite an interesting background. We're going to talk about his new book, and we are also going to talk about how he got there. And he is actually a Colorado guy and, you know, lives kind of in my neck of the woods, actually. So many of you listening may already be familiar with some of his desserts, interestingly enough. Welcome to the program, Cal Phaibus. Well, thank you. Thank you, Angie, for having me. All right. So you it's just funny because as we were talking in the break, we were talking about I want to move to Laguna and I live in Colorado and you have a house in Laguna Beach in California and also one here. And I had just had these advisories pop up on my phone about Laguna real estate. So I was like, oh, you're already living my life, Cal.
SPEAKER 06 :
Yeah, it's actually Laguna Niguel, which is just just a little. inland from Laguna. So it's about a five-mile drive to get to the beach from here.
SPEAKER 02 :
Down that little canyon.
SPEAKER 06 :
It's a nice little condo. Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER 02 :
Yeah, the weather is so beautiful there.
SPEAKER 06 :
It is. It's like perfect almost every day. A little chilly at night in the winter.
SPEAKER 02 :
Yes, yes. I used to live in Marina del Rey, and I agree with you. The beaches, I mean, people would be surprised to hear that, but it is a little chilly in the winter.
SPEAKER 06 :
Yeah, so we walk the beach a lot, and you've got to take a coat and Make sure you have a hoodie or something because the wind blows.
SPEAKER 02 :
So tell us about your book. And then I want to get into a little bit into, you know, you and your background. So many people want to become authors and have other careers like you did and, you know, are afraid to take that jump, you know, to write a book.
SPEAKER 06 :
Yeah. And I've always had stories in my head, you know, but I never really thought too much about it. writing them down because I was busy with my career and, you know, raising a family. But I started to write a book and I found out I could do it.
SPEAKER 02 :
And fiction, is that your thing, fiction, that you wanted to write a novel?
SPEAKER 06 :
Yes, I only write fiction. So the book that we're going to talk about today, The Angel and the Amazing Life of Maggie Love, is my second book that I've published. And it's centered around a character, a woman that has killed 20 people in her life. And the first line in my book is, Maggie Love is finally dead. An angel who kind of narrates the story is in charge of Maggie, and his job is to simply save her soul. Now, how is he going to save a woman's soul that's killed 20 people? Well, he's determined. And he's going to find out how. And he does that by taking her back into her life and making her relive the crimes again. And she kind of has a lot of deja vu. She remembers, I've done this before. I get to do it again. She's actually excited about it. And the angel's job is to just try to get her to repent. And she won't do it. She feels she's totally justified with every murder she's committed. So it is a mystery story, but the mystery isn't really who did it. The mystery is whether or not her soul is going to be saved.
SPEAKER 02 :
Ah, okay. And then is this for you? Are you doing a series of books? Have you written more already? How are you going about this?
SPEAKER 06 :
I haven't written more. I'm working on another book, but it's not related to this one. I do have an idea for a sequel for this one, so there may be a series.
SPEAKER 02 :
And then your background, I was talking about that. You're a retired chef, and you've invented thousands of desserts for high-end restaurants, and you did not go to culinary school, which is unusual, I guess, for, you know, like I have a pastry chef in the family, and I know a lot of people specifically go to school, but you learned cooking. In a bakery, a small bakery in California. And then just to add a little bit more, and you can go into more depth, that you work for this big dessert company, Stephen Charles, which I wasn't familiar with. And there's one right down the road from me where I guess they do their major shipments. I can't just go in there and buy desserts. I think like big trucks go in there and they send them to like high-end restaurants. So talk a little bit about that, how you got started at the small bakery in California and then how you became so well-versed in creating these desserts.
SPEAKER 06 :
Well, I didn't go to culinary school. That's true. I learned by just doing it, by getting up at 2 in the morning, going to work, baking every day in a small bakery, just learning the trade, learning how ovens work. Nobody ever taught me anything, learning how to read recipes. learning how to create recipes, which is even more important. And I have an older brother who was a natural entrepreneur, and he's just able to start companies and build them up to be very, very large. I went to work with him, first as a production guy, and then eventually, you know, we kind of figured out that I had a little bit of talent at creating desserts and creating recipes.
SPEAKER 02 :
So cool. Yeah.
SPEAKER 06 :
So I did that and we started to get into some major chains. The first big chain that we got into was the Red Lobsters. Since then, we've been into Olive Garden, Chili's. When we finally sold the company, our biggest customer by far was Starbucks. Oh, my goodness. And we have one very successful dessert in Starbucks. Well, there's actually different flavors of the same thing. And it is the cake pop.
SPEAKER 02 :
Oh, I knew you were going to say that. My daughter, she's 15. Faith, she's addicted to those. We get those all the time. They're so good.
SPEAKER 06 :
Yeah, they're not very expensive. They're small. But, you know, people seem to love them. And we were making millions, you know, towards the end of my career. We figured out how to automate it. And, you know, nobody had ever done anything like that before. So we had to, you know, basically design the machines and
SPEAKER 02 :
know in the early years it was all done by hand wow but now now it's all it's all automated and same product that is so wild okay so um it the um i just actually ate a dessert last night from um olive garden it was like a oh gosh it was my daughter's but i'm probably gonna get in trouble for finishing it and it was um you know many layers you know chocolate chips and then dark chocolate and then a white layer and then a another chocolate layer and then like a cookie bottom so I'm just curious, because I think that'd be so fun, and I'm sure there's stress involved, and I know that especially doing the production for millions of cake pops isn't always fun, but how does the process work for you to come up with a recipe?
SPEAKER 06 :
The creative process is hard to describe. You have to see it in your head, and you have to taste it in your head, and You know, you put something in the oven and you think you got it and then you taste it and it's just not right. And then you do it again and you do it again and you do it again until you got the product that you want.
SPEAKER 02 :
That is so cool. I never thought about it, that you'd picture it and taste it in your head. You'd picture what it's going to look like, that cake pop, and then you know what it's going to taste like, but then it's too dry, then it's not vanilla enough, then the coating's too hard or whatever, and so you just keep retrying it. Oh, that's cool to know, because one of my kids is always looking at Instagram and finding recipes. Okay, that's another interesting thing you do. Besides being a retired chef, selling that company, working in a small bakery in California... Then you also, you know, become an author. But what's this about being a cartoonist?
SPEAKER 06 :
Oh, yeah. I love to make these cartoons. They're on my Instagram. And I've developed a little bit of a following. Now, some cartoonists or, you know, maybe diehard cartoonists are kind of mad at me because I don't really draw. I'm an expert at manipulating a photo. So I can put a character into pretty much any scene I want. I can change his voice. I mean, I can change his facial features. I can change what he's doing. But I don't actually draw anything.
SPEAKER 02 :
Oh, that's funny. I'm on your, I found your page. And for people, it's Carl Fabus, but he goes by C.R. C.R. Fabus. And so you can see some of his, yeah, you've got a good little following. Okay. And so that's just kind of a little hobby of yours?
SPEAKER 06 :
Yeah, they're fun to make. And I enjoyed, you know, reading the comments that come back from some of the viewers. It's very satisfying.
SPEAKER 02 :
Oh, I bet it is. That's really cool. Okay, so you're living between Colorado and California. You're writing novels. You're working on another book. You're, I'm assuming, traveling because, you know, a lot of authors travel around. And then you've got four kids and four cats and one dog. Oh, my gosh. I have five pets, too.
SPEAKER 06 :
You do?
SPEAKER 02 :
Yeah.
SPEAKER 04 :
And I've got three teenagers.
SPEAKER 06 :
Yeah. Yeah, unfortunately we lost our dog a few months ago, but that happens, but, but, um, we still have the four cats and the four kids. And well, my, my kids are all grown up now. So two of them actually still live with me. Um, and, uh, my grandkids are actually, I have three of those and they're actually, one is going to turn the youngest one is going to turn 21 in June. Oh, cool.
SPEAKER 02 :
That's a fun age.
SPEAKER 06 :
Yeah, a Vegas party for my grandkids when they turn 21.
SPEAKER 02 :
Oh, my goodness. That's so exciting. All right. Well, I always loved it because, you know, I've been doing news for over 30 years now and I've worked in L.A. for many years and San Diego, Santa Barbara, Denver on TV. And then I changed over to radio about 10 years ago. So I love asking people, you know, how they got the passion for what they do. And so you can go through your career if you want and go through, you know, talk about your writing or how you got the passion for the baking, et cetera. Where did all this come from? Tell me a little about your story.
SPEAKER 06 :
Well, I, you know, as a young man, I was struggling. I worked in airline catering for a while. I wasn't happy with that. My brother already had a bakery and another brother bought a bakery in Ontario, California. And I went in half with him. And that's the earlier story that I said, that's how I learned how to bake. And eventually went to work for my older brother as a production guy and turned into a chef over the years. And at one time when our company was, really in a growth mode, I had 14 people working for me. 14 people creating desserts, some were clean up and all that, but I had about six other chefs under me. And we were creating a lot of desserts, putting a lot of things out. The customer that we deal with, the customers that we deal with are very picky. Most of them have been to culinary school and, you know, sometimes they're not easy to deal with.
SPEAKER 02 :
Yeah.
SPEAKER 06 :
But if you just keep pushing it and keep making a dessert that's really good, they're going to recognize that.
SPEAKER 02 :
Yeah.
SPEAKER 06 :
And then you get a big sale and it's very satisfying. Now, in terms... Go ahead. And as far as the writing goes, when my kids were growing up, I was telling them bedtime stories. And I made up these two bears. They're called Charlie and Harry. And I would tell them a story. And then, of course, the next night they wanted another one. I was under a lot of pressure. I had to come up with a new story like every night. And I finally decided to write them down. in the 90s, and I haven't published that book yet.
SPEAKER 02 :
Oh, that would be so cool. Go ahead, it's really funny, what?
SPEAKER 06 :
Yeah, it's really funny, and it's not really a kid's book. It's kind of like a book that anybody could enjoy, because it's funny.
SPEAKER 02 :
Well, we're out of time, unfortunately, but I want to make sure people can find you and your books and find out more about you. So what's the best place for us to find you and your latest book about Maggie Love?
SPEAKER 06 :
Well, my website is crfavis, that's F-A-B-I-S books.com, crfavisbooks.com. And that'll take you to my website. And from there, you can find Maggie. You can also find my first book, which is called Rome Never Fell. And there's some biographical stuff about me and what I've been doing and a few of the interviews I've done.
SPEAKER 02 :
Excellent. Well, Cal, thank you so much. It was a real pleasure having you on The Good News. Well, thank you so much for having me.
SPEAKER 06 :
It was so much fun.
SPEAKER 02 :
You bet. Thank you.
SPEAKER 01 :
Thank you for listening to The Good News with Angie Austin on AM670 KLTT.
Join Angie Austin as she hosts a heartfelt conversation with Grace Fox, diving deep into life's real struggles as shared through compelling stories. From personal journeys of letting go to understanding the psychological roots of attachment, this episode is filled with insight and introspection. Discover how faith and perseverance can transform arduous paths into enlightening experiences. The episode also shifts focus to the pressing topic of foster care, featuring expert insights from Kristen Pratt of Foster More. Learn about the challenges and triumphs involved in fostering and how communities can step up to support this vital cause. It's an episode that underscores resilience, hope, and the courage to face life's uncertainties. Immerse yourself in engaging narratives as our guests share their personal stories of overcoming journeys, the emotional ties to possessions, and the fortitude required in fostering. With thought-provoking discussions on securing peace through faith and fostering hope through love, this episode offers both encouragement and inspiration to navigate your life path.
SPEAKER 02 :
Welcome to The Good News with Angie Austin. Now with The Good News, here's Angie.
SPEAKER 06 :
Hello there friend, Angie Austin and Grace Fox. And today we are talking about real life struggles from her book, Fresh Hope for Today, Devotions for Joy on the Journey. Hey Grace. Hi, good to talk to you again. All right, so tell us about real life struggles.
SPEAKER 05 :
All right, so I wrote this one after interviewing a friend. Her name was Nancy. She lives in Oregon, actually. And she talked to me about how she and her husband had decided to take a hike. And so they trudged, as she described it, trudged four miles uphill through the forest. And they began second-guessing their wisdom in choosing to do this hike. but she said that they persevered and they got to the top of a, when they got to the top, it was this meadow that was just filled with flowers and glacier fed streams. And she said, it was just so beautiful. They sat down and had a picnic there and thoroughly enjoyed their time. It was that kind of a space where you work so hard to get somewhere. And when you, when you finally arrive, it's just so beautiful. You don't want to leave. And that was like their experience. And, And so when I heard her story, I thought, well, that is like real life in that sometimes we end up on a journey that is so arduous. And it's maybe not by choice, but it's just something that happens. We end up on this path that is so hard. And we just don't know that we're ever going to reach whatever it is we're trying to reach. But finally, the Lord just brings us into a place of rest. and it's it's a place that our soul is longing for after all of that maybe hardship that we've just come through but where we can sit down and we can rest and we know that he's with us and we know that he's got us and he's holding us close but wow it's you know the destination of getting there and experiencing that rest for our soul is good but the pathway to getting there is sometimes really hard
SPEAKER 06 :
Can you think of examples like in your own life where that really applied to you as well? And you're like, oh, I'm going to write this because I can really relate to this.
SPEAKER 05 :
Yeah, I think that when my husband and I sent the Lord nudging us to purge almost all of our earthly belongings to move aboard our sailboat home. And we didn't have a boat. It's not like we had this boat sitting around and we could just move into it. We had to find one that worked for living aboard and find a place to moor it. It was a journey that took a lot of energy mentally and emotionally as I had to part with all of these things that I counted precious. It was a path. It was arduous. And we didn't have a long time to do it. Once we got on it, once we actually found a boat and bought it, we had like six weeks to get rid of our stuff. And it was a path that wore me out in some ways, just emotionally every day, getting up and sorting again and purging again and saying goodbye again to these things that we'd held dear. But once we completed that and arrived, moved into the boat, settled in, And realize that, wow, you know, like this was a time of really stretching our faith and growing our faith. But we saw God come through. And it was a time of thanking him for that opportunity to walk that tough path. But to come to that place of knowing full well that we had obeyed him completely. And there was peace in that, even though I'd said goodbye to all these things that I'd once held dear, there was peace in my heart and there was joy in having obeyed. And it was something that, yeah, we walked that path and it was hard, but wow, it's been worth every step.
SPEAKER 06 :
You know, it's interesting you talk about, you know, peace of letting go of things that you once held dear. It's so hard sometimes to part with them. And there's some organizer lady that, you know, basically says, if you feel, if that item brings you joy, you know, keep it. And of course, if it's something you haven't, you know, used or worn or whatever for many years, you know, even if you're like, oh, I might wear that again. There's really no sense in keeping it. But I wonder why we have such a hard time letting things go. My... Mother-in-law has... The family calls her an organized hoarder. And so she has a basement that's probably 1,500 square feet. And it's the most organized basement stuffed to the brim with like 200 purses, you know, 400 pairs of pants. And they're those stretch pants that... you know like senior citizen ladies wear that you can slide on and have thanksgiving dinner and they still fit just fine in every color of the rainbow and then i'm like well why are there like 20 yellow pairs well she used to be super skinny so there's like you know three pairs and a size four three pairs and a size six three pairs and i'm not i'm like oh my gosh like you could never if you wore these pants every day like You probably, she couldn't even wear them like at the end of her life now and go through all those pants. You know what I mean? Like it's just crazy to me and she won't let us down there. Like my son really wants to go down there because he's a thrifter and he's been allowed down a couple of times like with oversight. Like she'll be down there with him. And he might get like a hockey jersey that my husband had when he was little. Or this last time my son came home with a stack of photographs of like my husband when he was, you know, a kid and in college. And then some from when we first got married, like probably 50 pictures. So that's what he came home with. But usually he gets like a little thing. I even got down there. Oh, I couldn't believe that was allowed down. But I needed one of those like shopping bags kind of like to take on the plane that... you know fooled up and she had some nicer ones down there that were like designed or whatever so I found a small one that you could maybe put like the size of like two bottles of wine maybe so that was perfect for like my snack on the plane I go oh look there's another one there's a matching one I'm thinking oh I should take both right she goes oh no no no no no don't get greedy girl And I'm looking around, right? Even three of the purses that I gave her, they're just hanging down there collecting dust, right? Like coach bags. And I'm like, are you sure you've never used that coach bag? Are you sure you want to keep that? Like I gave that to you 20 years ago. I would definitely use that. Oh, no, no, no, no. And I'm like, what? What is it? I don't understand the psychology grace behind that kind of hoarding. You know what I mean? And I know they say it can relate back to maybe losses. Like her dad was a police officer and he was killed in the line of duty when she was like maybe 8, 9, 10. And I've heard that like losing, like if you lose a child or lose something big, like somehow hanging onto these things. And I know that that's not like the Christian way to do it. We're not supposed to get our like comfort and our like, you know, out of things. They're not supposed to give us like that comfort. Right. But it's perplexing to me. Like I can't wrap my head around it, but it's got to have something to do with it giving you comfort or comfort.
SPEAKER 05 :
um security something like that you know that we're supposed to be secure through christ but apparently we're secure through 200 pairs of pants and 200 purses yeah the word security came to my mind as you were talking and i think that's it is that we look to things for our security but if that house burned down if that house were to burn down today how would she respond right like if she found her security in those things that'd be a significant loss for her But the one thing about hanging on to the Lord and finding our security in him is he's never going to leave us. Nothing's ever going to take him away from us. The scripture says in Romans that nothing separates us from his love. And so no matter what happens, even on those tough walks that we take through life, sometimes doesn't matter where he leads us or what he asks us to go through or what he allows in our life. still we can find hope and we can find peace and we can find joy if our security is in him and not in stuff that can be gone in a heartbeat.
SPEAKER 06 :
Yeah, and I think with so many of the people, I keep seeing these pictures because I've got so many friends in the news business in Los Angeles. And one of my girlfriends went out really early this morning. And, you know, I don't think we can really wrap our heads around the loss that those people experienced, right? And I know everybody says, well, you know, you still have your life and things can be replaced, etc., etc. But it's a whole... change of like all those lives because it's not like a house in your neighborhood burns down and oh you get rid of it you rebuild like it's so toxic up there and now they'll have problems with mudslides right but your grocery store is gone your library is gone your mechanic is gone all your neighbors homes are gone so like then you go up there and you rebuild and in the midst of all this toxic you know material that's up there and even working up there you know how how easy is it going to be to get workers that want to go through all this burnt toxic you know you know destruction that they need to throw into a big dumpster and you know start from the ground up and then the soil and i don't know just that kind of loss um you know, being secure in Christ, we're supposed to find our security there. But I can imagine when you return to your neighborhood and you don't even know if there's a possibility of you rebuilding, like, I'm very curious to see what it'll be like in 20 years. I'm assuming the oceanfront Malibu homes where those people have money coming out of their ears and they're like $10 million houses, those will get rebuilt because even if you don't have insurance money, you're loaded and you can rebuild. And the people in Pacific Palisades, you know, those are very expensive homes too in the millions, but some of them may have been in a different position of maybe owning it for 30 years and they they aren't multi-millionaires it just became millionaires because the you know real estate values went up so much but you know i'm just very curious to see what that will be like in 20 or or so years if it is all rebuilt because it is such a prime spot but i sometimes i feel like so the picture that i had when my friend sent all these pictures out today um was of just kind of despair and just kind of like a hopelessness that many of them feel about, you know, where do we go from here kind of feeling. And I think some of us have that feeling about other things in life, you know, where we end of a relationship oh gosh where do i go from here or the loss of someone a loved one you know how do i work my way through this how do i claw my way out of this i just watched a documentary um on avicii this dj who was so talented just oh so talented and he committed suicide and i just thought to myself like gosh, you were such a genius with creating music. If you didn't want to do those concerts, couldn't you just stop doing the concerts and just create with other, he was working with the top of the top of the top, you know, musicians. And couldn't you just do that? Like, couldn't you see your way out of it? And I know that that's why we have faith. I know that's why we have like the Lord to turn to. But I just think people get lost in a sea of despair sometimes.
SPEAKER 05 :
I agree with you on that. I think depression and anxiety are on the rise. And I just want to encourage listeners today to not give up, to keep putting that one foot in front of the other, just like my friend and her husband, as they were going on that path. They didn't know it was going to be four miles long. They didn't know how long it was going to take or how arduous, how steep it got. They just heard it was a great path. So, you know, the path that we end up on, we don't know where it's going to lead to eventually. We don't know sometimes how steep it's going to get. But like these poor people that have lost so much out in California, they don't know how long this is going to take before they can return to their life or what their life is going to look like. What is their new normal going to be? Where is their workplace going to be? Where are their kids going to go to school? What about their church family if they lost their church? So, you know, everything is disrupted in their lives. But to not give up hope, just every day put one foot in front of the other on that path and persevere because eventually it will even out. We don't know what that will look like. There are no guarantees, but It's going to be okay is what we want to say, right? It's going to be okay.
SPEAKER 06 :
Well, I always love, you know, your Fresh Hope for Today devotions. That's the book, Fresh Hope for Today, Devotions for Joy on the Journey. If you want some hope, it's a great book. Always enjoy talking to Grace Fox. And if you want to find her and her books, you can go to gracefox.com. Thank you, friend. Thank you.
SPEAKER 03 :
Manitou Springs is listening to the Mighty 670 KLT.
SPEAKER 01 :
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SPEAKER 06 :
Hey there, friend. Angie Austin here with the good news. Well, you know, if you've listened to the program over the years, I guess I've been on, gosh, radio and TV like 25 years. So many of you know my background and I have a real heart for foster care because I spent some time in foster care growing up and really was appreciative of the families that took me in. Joining us is Kristen Pratt, and she is with Foster More, the leadership team. Welcome, Kristen.
SPEAKER 04 :
Thank you so much for having me, Angie.
SPEAKER 06 :
All right, so let's just start off, first of all, I know that there is a need for foster care. I've seen books where it's like page after page after page of kids that are looking for homes. So is this crisis in America worse now? And just tell us about the foster care crisis in general.
SPEAKER 04 :
Yeah, so... Any given day, it fluctuates a bit, but there are approximately 400,000 children in foster care in America. So it is, it has seen some slight improvements the last few years, but a lot of those kids are experiencing, you know, over two to three placements a year, the majority of them. And so there's a real need for loving, stable homes for these kids who are facing a lot of obstacles.
SPEAKER 06 :
Yes. Oh my goodness. All right. So I know that you guys do some research and there was a barrier, a significant barrier preventing, you know, families from stepping forward to, I'll tell you what my mind would be. Well, first of all, I have three teenagers, five pets and off and on my 82 year old mom. But my barrier would probably be my husband. But I might be able to work on him like once the kids are gone, because they're all in high school now. But the barrier for me is my spouse, like I would do foster care. And I know it's rough. I don't have any fairy tale like version of how difficult it could potentially be. So what are the barriers that people see in terms of becoming foster parents?
SPEAKER 04 :
Yeah, I mean, that is a barrier, like your spouse, you have to both be on board. But We always tell people, too, there's a need for foster parents of all kinds, all ages, you know, empty nesters, young people, older people, single people. So there's really, you know, anyone can step up there. And one of the things that we found that people would say is that they couldn't take the time off work. So they'd say, well, my job doesn't allow for me to take that time off work. And, you know, like there's a lot that goes into that. Um, when the child is placed in the home, not only do you need that time to bond with, with some child who has by definition experienced some trauma, but you also need the time to get them enrolled in a new school and doctor's appointments and, you know, all the appointments. So you really, it's important to have that time off when the child joins a home and a lot of businesses don't provide for that. And it stops a lot of potential foster parents from moving forward when they find out that information.
SPEAKER 06 :
Um, have you, have you, like, is this something that you try to address with businesses to try to, I know that my, my station that I worked for one of the gals on the, one of the weather women, uh, adopted a child and she got, you know, the typical time off that you would get. But in this case it was an infant, but I know some businesses do give you time off, but I would. assume with a single parent that that would just kind of like you know take that option off the plate for them to become a foster parent but do um does the foster care system help with things like um you know daycare if you're getting like a kid that's two three four that needs you know daycare during the day they do there are it depends on the state you live in but there are some you know provisions for that and that's another thing that we work with businesses like if a business has on-site child care um we ask that you know
SPEAKER 04 :
youth in foster care if someone becomes a foster parent their child can be um immediately have access to the to the facility yeah but um yeah one of the things we realized is that a lot of the businesses that were offering like you were talking about adoption paid time off for adoption or birth foster care was just overlooked because yes you know a lot of people think of foster care as a road to adoption. And so they get, you know, the time off when the child is adopted, but you really need that time off when the child is placed in the home. And the child is not always adopted in foster care. About half the time they're reunited with the parents. So we need all different kinds of homes, people that want to adopt, people that want to be there for a family that needs some support. And so we want to make sure that businesses are specifically giving that time off for just being a foster parent
SPEAKER 06 :
Now, I understand that Foster More is obviously helping with this whole workplace initiative, you know, trying to get places to make it more, you know, user-friendly to become a foster parent. Can you talk about that?
SPEAKER 04 :
Yeah. So at Foster More, we have sort of like a ladder of engagement on our website. We try to engage people in all different ways. So, you know, if you want to learn about becoming a mentor for youth in foster care, if you want to have the opportunity to pack a duffel bag or get involved and volunteer in different ways, you can start on our website to do that. And one of the tabs on the website is to become a foster parent, where you can fill out a little form, and then we can connect you with someone, depending on where you live, someone in your local area that can help you learn about becoming a foster parent. And the same thing for the workplace pledge, there's a tab on the website where you can learn more about If you're a business owner or an employee and you're interested in having your business become officially foster-friendly, you can do that on the website, too, and we'd be happy to talk more to anyone about their business becoming foster-friendly.
SPEAKER 06 :
All right. I'm just wondering, you know, for people listening today who are thinking about becoming a foster parent, I know a lot of it seems like overwhelming and, you know, all the things you have to tackle to be approved, et cetera. So how do you recommend people get, you know, started on the process? Obviously your website with all the tabs, you know, a really good idea. But how can someone personally, I mean, talking to someone, that's a great idea that you just gave us. What else?
SPEAKER 04 :
Yeah, well, again, research shows that it takes about 18 months to two years for people. Once they start thinking about becoming a foster parent, you know, do you have the idea to actually become a foster parent? So, you know, it does take, and as it should take a lot of thought for people, it takes a lot of research. So it's something you can start looking into. It's a little bit different than requirements in every state. You can start asking people about it. You can look into other ways to, to get involved and volunteer first. I mean, the need is great for foster parents, but if you want to learn more about foster care, you can volunteer. There are tons of amazing organizations all across the country doing great work. You can learn more about how to get involved in different ways. you know, maybe on the path to becoming a foster parent, as well.
SPEAKER 06 :
Now, in your particular case, what I always love to get people's passion for things, obviously, I'm interested in this topic, because I live with families and relatives, and I only had one, quote, unquote, official foster home, but I had many places where I stayed, you know, so what what what is behind your passion for this kind of work?
SPEAKER 04 :
Yeah, I've always been involved in working with kids. I have a background in special education and I became a CASA, which is a court appointed advocate. And that's something people can look into as well, where you support a youth in foster care, you go to court with them and you're sort of their mentor and their person along the way. And so I learned a lot about foster care that way. And just, you know, the more it's something that, like I was saying, people don't talk about that much, but it's such a big issue. And once you, it's like you can't unsee, you know, what you've seen and what you've learned. And it really requires so many more people to step up in any way that you can. And I think it's something that you realize, like, we're all connected to this issue. It's not just a sort of other or someone, you know, far off that you don't know. Like you said, like almost all the time, When we talk to people at businesses, we hear stories like yours where it was like I was in foster care. My cousin was in foster care. My parents were. I was a foster parent. And so so many people are connected. And it's just not only when you provide the workplace benefits, you're also getting people to talk about it, too, which is so important. And that's why we really appreciate you having us on, too, so we can talk about it.
SPEAKER 06 :
Now, I'm wondering in terms of I know that there's like people are thinking, oh, foster care, you know, I'm going to have this kid for 18 years. But there are other, you know, that sounds terrible, but I said it like that. But you know what I mean? Like people are overwhelmed by the prospect of having a child that long or maybe someone, you know, like myself, who's already raised their kids, who's maybe looking at teens or something of the sort. I know you can specify what you're interested in, but is there also like emergency short-term care where you might just have a baby for a week or, you know, like shorter-term options per se? Now, one of my girlfriends, she's a nurse, her husband's a doctor. They did have a short-term situation. And then once the little girl had stayed with them for quite some time, she told me, well, we're going to adopt her. And I was like, wow, like your kids are in college, like yikes. And she said it's the right thing to do because she'd been with them for so long.
SPEAKER 04 :
Yeah. So most places you can sign up for respite care. So that's basically like giving a foster parent a weekend break or a few day break. Oh, I've never heard of that. Yeah. So that's a really cool way to sort of like dip your toe in and get involved. It's called respite care. And also there's a really huge need for people that don't want to adopt from foster care that they just want to support. Because like I was saying, the goal of foster care, the ultimate goal is is to support whole families so that kids can be reunified. And that, you know, doesn't always happen. And sometimes, you know, the best situation is for them to stay with the foster parents. But if at all possible, you try to support a whole family so that the child can be reunited with their biological parents. And that requires people to step up temporarily, right? Like that's so important. And I think a lot of times people think of it more as like a road to path to adoption, which it can be. But there's a huge need for people that want to just be there and provide a safe, loving, supportive space for a child in the family who's going through a crisis.
SPEAKER 06 :
All right. We only have a couple of minutes left, but I can't believe I've never heard of respite care. Okay. So would you keep the child for the day or is this something like more like several days or do you kind of take them maybe on? I know CASA, they take them on like outings and things like that from their foster situation. So what are the possibilities for respite care for a foster parent?
SPEAKER 04 :
So respite care, you know, I think it depends on each in each state. I think it's a little bit different, but most of the time it's, you know, two, three days you're certified as a foster parent. So you would have to get the certification, like, you know, the cost of you're not, you have to have like a background check and everything, but you're not certified as a foster parent. So if you're doing respite care, you have to go through the whole process of making sure your home is suitable and everything. And then it would be, I think the time really varies, you know, it could be, Two nights, three nights a week. It's just really that time, like say a foster parent needs a break or is going on vacation or has a family emergency, you know, and they need to go out of town. So someone providing respite care would give them that.
SPEAKER 06 :
Yeah, I think about, you know, business trips. Okay, we have one minute left. Tell me your takeaway. What do you want to tell people that are, like, kind of on the fence? Like, what do you want people to know if you had a one-minute elevator speech to give to us?
SPEAKER 04 :
I think the main thing we want people to know, and this is what we say at Foster Mer, these kids are amazing, and they're resilient, and they have the potential to overcome anything, and they really just need someone... to step up and be there for them. The outcomes for kids in foster care are not great, and that can change if we as a society and as individuals step up and are there for these kids.
SPEAKER 06 :
Well, I sure appreciate all that you do. My foster care situation was quite interesting because I come from a family where my dad has his PhDs, well-educated, but we had a lot of, he was estranged from our family for like 35 years. And then one of my brothers was murdered. Another one ended up homeless. Wow. Here I graduated top of my class. I worked full time all through high school and college. So for somebody listening, just the opportunity to stay with my foster family and other families that really cared, I think really made a difference in my life and where my first job was at NBC News out of college in Los Angeles. So thank you, Kristen, for all you do for others. Really appreciate you.
SPEAKER 04 :
Thank you so much, Angie. I'd love to hear more about your story.
SPEAKER 06 :
I'd love to talk again. Thanks, Kristen.
SPEAKER 02 :
Thank you for listening to The Good News with Angie Austin on AM670 KLTT.
